It was suggested that in honor of my twin brother's 30th birthday this coming Friday that I dedicate this week's post to that subject. Instead, I think I'll talk about myself for a minute, though so significant a milestone is still far away for me. Ha. ;-)
I am fairly certain there was a time when thirty sounded ancient. However, having almost made it there, I'm thinking the other side isn't so bad. All across the board, things are as good now as they have ever been. Rather than sadden me my reflections have instead reminded me that I have been fortunate through the years to be surrounded by the best in so many areas--intellectually, physically, emotionally. I can see how these people have shaped the person I am and continue to become.
If you'll indulge me, I would like to take a moment to acknowledge them...
There was Ryan Popp who gave me an incredible little boy that I feel blessed, stunned and a little terrified that life saw fit to entrust, in part, to me; There was Jim Surber, in my early-20's, who challenged me to learn to communicate in ways not so aggressive as those I witnessed as a child; There was Cindy Wright who showed me unconditional--truly unconditional--love; There was Mike Cartwright--who, at 15, when I proclaimed that I "would be somebody someday"--informed me quite simply that I already was somebody;
There was Andy Lalumia who taught me that sometimes the future we think we want isn't nearly as good as the one that is in store; There is Christine Davis who has taught me that friendship involves a whole lot of patience and just a bit of blindness to the flaws we all have (as she has done for me more than once!); There is John Miller who taught me that the most unexpected people can save you even when you don't realize you're drowning; There was Gary Gummig who taught me that complete strangers can change your life for the better;
Richard Ross who taught me that life will give you someone\something to make you laugh even when a moment before you didn't believe you would ever stop crying; Sonja Gautama who reminded me that discounting a single decision as a regret often times disregards all the good that did happen as a result of an action that--at first (and even last) glance--might appear to be a failure; There is Rob North who reminded me that everyone has something we can relate to, if we will just take a moment to truly listen;
Lisa Buckner for walking through the valleys with me; Mr (Greg) Butler who fought for me when I wasn't yet fighting for myself, for starting a chain of events that eventually gave me the strength to build a safe place for myself; Ms (Terry) Sollazzo whose advice I have never forgotten... to write truthfully and, at the same time, from my heart; Mr (Michael) Brooks for telling me "Things don't have to fall apart, the center will hold"; Officer Pope for sparing $5 for a hungry kid; Sterling (unknown) for giving me a chance when I had no experience on my resume to back up my claim of being able to do the job I knew (and have since proven) I could do;
Bryant--My incredibly intelligent, articulate son... for making being a mom cool; Jovi--Baby girl, I hope we can soon welcome you to our family officially... regardless, for blessing the path we have thus far been fortunate to share.
There are more. Some whose names I know and many more whose names I don't. Of all the material things I have gained and lost and gained again in the past thirty years, of all the different roads I have taken and the achievements most of society would judge me by... When I look back, it's the people who have shared the journey with me that I see.
I am human. I have bad days. I make mistakes. Sometimes I get angry when I shouldn't or frustrated when I wish I wouldn't... But in those rare moments when my own strength isn't enough, I call on my memories of these people and I find my strength there; knowing that many of them have believed in me and seen me through worse.
I don't have the religious faith of many, but I have been blessed and I am truly grateful for every step of this journey so far. I have been fortunate to have cried and screamed and loved and learned and lost and laughed so hard I could barely breathe. Just as importantly, I am very much looking forward to doing more of the same in whatever time I have remaining! As my more distinguished colleagues often say... Bring it on! ;-)