Considering the Cost of the Fight.

I had an, "Oh, shit," moment yesterday that I thought only fair to share with you all. I received a text message from a bright, strong young man that I've known since he was about... man, I guess he would have been about 8-years-old when we met. He's 17 now. The text message said that on Monday he's signing papers to join the Army, as a member of the infantry.

I found myself asking him if he'd thought about the police academy. I could totally see him on some department's SWAT team. He said he'd thought of that just the day before. I suggested he not sign the papers just yet, that he's only a high school junior and that the Army will be there once he's had time to be certain he's adequately explored all the other options he's thinking of.

There were perhaps many valid, legitimate points in my suggestions, but I want to admit and take a hard look at the least noble of my motivations... Fear. Beyond my reasonable, logical suggestions of other career paths, part of me was choking on that ugliest of emotions: fear.

What does that fear mean? Am I hypocrite? Do I only believe in our military when its someone else carrying the burden? Why do I suddenly feel contempt for some recruiter who *might* be telling this boy his only way to a better life is this? Am I lying to you and--worse--myself about what I believe in terms of our country and our military?

My twin brother is in the Air Force. I am over-the-top proud of him. I have known fear related to his profession, but I tell myself he's not on the front-lines. His risks, though very real, are mitigated to a degree.

In this boy's case, though, he's pretty much volunteering for the front-lines in any battle this country might undertake in the coming years. His risks, like many others in that role, are enormous. This soon-to-be man who would be the perfect poster boy for an American soldier... I still see him laughing as a child, spilling hot chocolate on a store window (accidentally), passionately singing "Pour some _stupid_ on me" because he misunderstood some Def Leppard lyrics (LOL), looking around a hotel room in Florida for the toothpaste that somehow fell off his toothbrush during his mad dash to the sink (omg... ROFL... you had to be there...)

I don't have a lot of answers to the questions I am asking myself, but I wanted to share the story. I know that it's important to me to know that this boy truly came to the Army decision for the right reasons. My brother, for instance, went through and graduated college before he signed with the USAF. He was older and I know that he arrived at his decision because he felt it was best for him, not because he felt it was the only option he had.

Perhaps that's part of my trouble--I truly do prefer to think of our Armed Forces as a volunteer force. I guess, selfishly, that makes it slightly easier for me to accept that some of them might not come home. I can tell myself that they made an educated, noble decision for their country... but maybe a lot of them don't and that's harder to swallow.

I can tell you one thing. It makes me want to be damn certain we are careful before committing our troops to anyone elses' battle.

These kids. They are our best, our brightest, our strongest. To risk them... It's a reminder that our cause had better be just. Especially if they are trusting us--more than themselves--with making that assessment.

(Purple State, USA, has expanded! You can also check us out on OpinionEditorial.com!)

Comments

[Steven C]

I don't think you're a hypocrite at all. Any reasonable person would feel those fears. I know if he does this for the right or even the wrong reasons you will still set aside your questions and stand behind him 100%. There's nothing hypocritical about that.

[Sally & Jim]

We felt similarly when our niece joined the Navy. It's only natural to want to protect the people we love, even as they are trying to protect us!

[Zack Lee]

We lost our son in Afghanistan. God bless you for asking the questions you do. They aren't wrong. We can ask questions and still love our country and our military. Like you said, we owe it to them to ask questions.

[Nick Lewis]

I believe you will support this boy no matter what he decides -- and that you will continue to support our very deserving military -- that doesn't make you a hypocrite at all!

[Allyson]

what did he end up deciding?